Civil Wedding in Dubai by Danielle Tan

Our Civil Wedding

My Story

I was so inspired by my wedding planner's story of her life that I decided I should share mine as well...

here goes... very long read....

I was born in Perpetual Succor Hospital in Manila. My aunts told me I was

supposedly born in St. Jude Hospital but then they found out how expensive

it was going to be there and so they ran away and escaped. My mom's name is Meriam,

she is from Butuan City in Agusan del Norte. And my dad, his name is Oscar and

he is from Bulacan. They met in MAnila, in my grandma's boarding house, they were

neighbors. My grandma owned a carinderia in Padre Campa. They were married in

Butuan, with just my dad as a representative of his family.

For as long as I could remember, mommy was always abroad. She worked as a nurse

in Saudi Arabia. I was brought up by my aunt and ninang Violet. I was five when

I started living with her. To her I owe whatever it is Ive become now. We used to

live in a very big house, which had a very long staircase. She would carry me on

piggy back through the stairs evry morning before school. She brought me up

like I was her own daughter. Everyone knows that I am her daughter. She told

evryone about it. So that everytime mommy arrives, I get confused what to tell

people. Ninang is a disciplinarian. She is tough. Very stingy and was a bit obsessive compulsive. She taught me so many things, and made me the best that I can be.

I felt like an only child. My brother however, was in the care of my dad. He

did not have all the special attention that I was getting from ninang. Ninang raised

me well. She gave me evrything I needed, but not everything I wanted. I was explained properly why I can't have a barbie doll house, that it was waste of money and that it will only accumulate dust. She enrolled me in ballet, piano lessons, i was a girl scout, a cathechist and all that. She wanted all the good things for me.

I grew up differently. Coming from school, I get dropped off in her RTW store.

It is called Vayolet's Gift Arcade. Since kindergarten till mid of high school,

I was in that store all afternoons, weekends, and holidays. I grew up in that

gift shop. I was a trained sales girl since I was little. Christmases were spent

selling gifts and clothes through the day, and sleeping through noche buena of

fatigue.

I remember one night when ninang, and mommy and daddy were arguing. Ninang was so

furious because mommy and daddy were taking me back from her. She was crying

of anger. I was literally being fought for. My other arm was with ninang and the

other with daddy. If only I could divide myself. I know how painful it was for

ninang. But mommy would like our family to be whole again. She decided she wants

us together.

I went to live with our family. In a very small apartment. It was so different

living with ninang. I lived with my brother Ricky. We were close but we had a

very different upbringing. There were times when we didn't have any money to buy

food, and they would ask me to go to ninang and ask money. For everthing else

like electricity bills, tuition fee, clothes, ninang provided almost for evrything.

When I started college, ninang said she wouldn't send me to school if I don't go

back and live with her. And so I did. Mom and dad didn't have a choice. Halfway

through college, mommy decided to go back to Saudi Arabia. So that she could send me and Ricky and Regine to school. And so she did. Little did we know that she was having illnesses. That she has always had health problems.

I remember, as a teenager, i was very difficult. I had a boyfriend at a very early

age. I was with the same guy for years. Things went wrong and terribly bad

with him. His family hated me, not knowing what I went through with their son.

I had a bestfriend since grade two, and I lost her because of my first boyfriend.

I had a very good friend since high school and she died brutally in the hands

of her drug addict cousin. Til today, I keep in touch with her mom and she's

always happy to see me, and tells stories of what could have beens if Apple was

alive.

I met my bestest friends in college. Mindy in UP Baguio, Graciette and Joselito

in UP Diliman. They have always been there for me. These people are my treasures

in life. We all went from crazy and stupid to grown ups and still crazy.

I had strings of flings and boylets. I am ashamed of this. I have treated men

badly because I never felt what it really was to be loved unconditionally.

I met another guy. And thought that he was the one. But we had to part ways when

my mom's kidneys failed and I had to be the bread winner of the family. I had to work hard so we can afford dialysis. It is the only way for me to help my mom. The distance was difficult and made me realize what I really want in life. That I knew there was love, but love wouldn't be love without trust and commitment. That the future won't just lay itself on you. You have to make it. I did not see his drive for life. I did not see his drive for our love. The gaps have become bigger and bigger andcan no longer be mended. I was stupid and had mistakes that broke me.  I had given up on love and I was broken. And empty. I never felt so alone in my life.

It was in the lowest and darkest point in my life when I met Sonnie. He brought

light in my life. I knew that he saw me so broken and he was just always there

to listen to me. And somehow, fix me. I told him everything there is to tell about me.

And I did not feel any resentment from him... only acceptance and later on, love. Our love started from friendship which whirlwind into love. His faith in me and what I can be has made a better person. we love each other deeply and unconditionally. I never thought I could love this way. I am so happy I met him and now I am so happy that soon he will be my partner in life. my husband and my bestfriend.

My friends tell me taht to love me is complicated. I have my whole family to support. I send my sister to college. My mom has been on dialysis treatment for almost three years now. Three times a week dialysis. She is being worked up for a kidney transplant. Through this, we found out there was a tiny cancer cell in her thyroid, and she had to go through radioactive treatment. She had consistent

coughs which was mistaken to be tuberculosis. She was given wrong medication and she

is now partially blind. She can't walk properly because of all these. You may think

that because of all these, she might be unhappy or miserable. But she is not! She is happy and still very thankful that she is with us. She is crazy about her grand son, Vaughn.She doesn't mind being blind. She still feels hope. That one day, she can see again. In God's own time, we know she will. My mom is my strength. I don't see my family as obligations.

I love them dearly and I will continue to support them no matter what. Ive explained all these to Sonnie, and he doesn't mind at all. He understands all of my baggages and he vows to help me with everything that I want to do in life. All he wants in return, is for us to share each other's lives and commit ourselves into always being there for each other. He sees himself waking up with me and travelling places with me, having baby girls with me , and having to say i love you's over and over again with me.

I have always seen myself as lucky. I have been through lots of things in my life. Yet I am here. Still sane. And happy. I find joy in little things, and I never ever forget to call on Him. It is true what they say, that He will never forsake us. And I have never ever felt Him leave me, not even for a minute.

Tres MAnilas

Ang saya saya maging top bid! three manilas all 2 days. ang saya saya ko! iniisip ko na ngayon pa lang ang mga kakainin ko. jollibee chicken joy, lechon, crispy pata, wow.

The Day I said Yes!